Olly's normal clients are dogs - I'm not too sure what that says about me but when the photoshoot commenced and Olly began to squawk to get my attention I knew that either my suspisions that I have undiagnosed ADHD might be correct or that Olly ACTUALLY thought I was an animal and wanted me to face the camera.
I had arrived with a FULL suitcase of outfits that as I left the house, had inspired Darren to ask (hopefully) "Are you moving out?"
"You wish mate!" "This is for the photoshoot" and it was at that moment that Darren knew my day was written off.
As it goes, Olly had booked in another client (of the furry, barking variety) shortly after me so as I threw outfits on and off and got thoroughly BORED of trying to smile and keep my HUGE ears out of shot, I felt confident that we'd get the money shot.
Olly uploaded the pics to his Apple Mac thingy and Jesus, Mary and Joseph....... was that screen large and HONEST!
All I could see was this gormless grin staring back at me looking quite frankly horrifying with all my wrinkles and skin pigmentation on show.
I felt I looked gross. (EDITED to add: NOT anything to do with Olly's shots - more the fact that I had expected a miracle and to look 20 years younger, fitter and well not like me!)
But there was nothing I could do as the next dog had arrived.
Thankfully, Olly is a superstar and said "If you're not happy come back later".
So he uploaded the shots to a memory stick so I could view them at home and we arranged I would come back later.
Once I'd got home and viewed the images I felt thoroughly exhausted and really couldn't be arsed with going through all that again - smiling is EXHAUSTING and I decided then to do alot less of it.
However, I had gone to the trouble of washing my hair and caking on a thick layer of makeup so I thought I might as well make the most of being clean and try again.....
So that's what I did.
3.30pm I turned BACK up at Olly's front door, in a different outfit, already feeling a bit more relaxed as I had a clearer idea of what I wanted (aside from Olly's camera to perform Mother-fucking MIRACLES and make me look like a supermodel!)
BISH! BOSH! BASH!
We realised the cheesy grin wasn't for me - I wanted my personality to shine through and after a bit of jumping around we managed to get some pretty cool shots (see below - thats one of them!)
The moral of the story here is be relaxed and wear a jumper that states your age and you'll be fine.............
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